Here’s What Nigerians Probably Think About Plans To Ease The Lockdown

April 28, 2020

Unless you had a boring, social media-free night on April 27th, you definitely heard about the Nigerian government’s plan to have a gradual ease of the lockdown, which has so far been in place for a little over a month.

Everybody has an opinion on this. Some think the government is right to open the economy again. Others believe this is a cop-out because it can no longer afford the palliative measures while the rest are convinced the government is in cahoots with Thanos to reduce Nigeria’s population by half.

We’ll let you all argue the reasoning behind easing the lockdown out, but we’re more interested in peeking into the minds of prople who will be directly affected by a lockdown ease starting May 4th. Here’s what different Nigerians are probably thinking about a lockdown ease:

The every day, sceptical Nigerian

Let me bend if my eyelash mistakenly leaves this house on May 4th. You and who wants to catch coro?

The Nigerian stuck in a hellish job

Before HR sends that ‘return to work’ email, should I just de-activate my email address? Maybe I should just form unlooking when it comes.

Nigerians that commute to work in public transportation

Will I be shouting ‘social distancing’ when someone tries to give me their baby inside the bus? Which kain problem?

Policemen on curfew duty

How much will I charge for after-curfew ‘anything for the boys’ oh? Is ₦5000 too much? This one that economy is hard…

Pastors that do usually perform ‘miracles’

scared person ielts Zikoko

Let everybody’s head be correct oh. Nobody should bring any ‘patient’ for me to heal. Everybody has the one that is doing them.

Tailors ready to cash out

Finally, I can use all this ankara my customers ‘forgot’ with me in December.

Nigerian governors that came into office specifically to flex

Growing up in Nigeria

Which one is pandemic crisis management now? It’s travel I came to travel, wuzzaldis?

What do you think about the plans to ease the lockdown?

Boyin Plumptre

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